What Are The Signs That My Relationship Is Ending?
Author: Elaine Bothwell
Here are some signs that the relationshp is ending
Watch the video and read the article to get a few tips to help you identify when a relationship is ending.
There are a few women out there who didn’t see it coming, i.e. that the relationship was ending, but in the main, the signs that the relationship is ending will first hit you in your gut. You will have doubts, niggles, you will feel insecure and more paranoid than ever. These little things are the first signs that the relationship is ending.
The other signs that the relationship is ending starts with his behaviour.
Has he started to act differently?
This is going to be different for each guy, but does he stay out later, has he become less communicative? Is he more cagy and not wanting to tell you what’s going on? Has he withdrawn more emotionally and you can feel the distance the chill when you’re around him?
If he does then it may be a sign that the relationship is ending- though of course compare this to how he usually acts.
It’s like when you have worked in a particularly gossip filled environment, and you walk into a room and it goes quiet, you just know someone has been talking about you, or someone has a problem with you, no matter how much they deny it. It will be like this with him. At the end of any relationship, this becomes magnified.
Some other signs may include the conversation between you and him has dried up, and you only talk when you have to, for instance if you have children then it’s to communicate about that.
He may become more argumentative and start finding more fault with you and what you do together, suddenly what wasn’t a problem before is now a problem. What he was chilled about before now he gets all steamed up about . You may find yourself in a position of you can’t do right for wrong, a no win situation.
And that leads me to your behaviour.
Typically when a woman senses the end of a relationship her behaviour starts to change to compensate-so if her husband or boyfriend becomes more argumentative, she becomes less so, so as not to rock the boat.
If he withdraws and she can’t connect with him, she may become louder and do things just to get some response out of him.
So think about your behaviour, has it changed? Do you feel like you’re walking on egg shells? Have you become more irritable, less settled and less patient?
In your mind do you think your relationship is ending?
What can be surfacing in you is the fear of what his behaviour might mean for you, which won’t be helping you to deal with this, and the upshot is, his behaviour and yours, if it’s you who has withdrawn, will show, you won’t be able to hide how you both feel about each other.
Now if you really want to know if your relationship is ending for real, then the best way to tackle this is to ask him ‘Is it the end’? and watch for his response. Whether he says anything or not, you will know.
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Hi Angel
Sometimes there are signs and sometimes relationships get too intense too quickly and burn out. The trouble with most new relationships is that the beginning of it is so exciting this can be mistaken for love and even that you have met your ideal or perfect partner. It usually takes between 1 and 3 months for the honeymoon period to ware off and it’s at this stage that the relationship will either go from strength to strength or fold. This is the period where either person in the relationship will be assessing whether they want to be with that person or not and they start to notice all the things that are wrong with the other person and set of to try and change them.
As clichéd as this is – you will get over him and you will find someone new. AND the best way not to repeat this kind of missed communication is to learn from what went ‘wrong’ and vow not to repeat it.
Keep well and remember you are worth the love of a good man
Elaine
Me and my boy friend have been together for 10 months. And I feel he is no longer attractied to me or even wants to be bothered by me. When I am around him sometimes I get that vibe of him not wanting to be around me. When I do talk to him its always that I’m not keeping him entertained or I’m boring. I’m believing that our relationship is comin to an end….wht should I do?
Hi teatea
If it is as you say that your boyfriend is no longer attracted to you, then I am truly sorry that you are experiencing that. From what you say he is making it difficult for you to be together because these types of comments, typically come from a person who is pulling away from their partner. They do this to break the emotional ties therefore making it easier for them to leave the relationship, it’s a bit like getting yourself emotionally ready before a live presentation or visiting the dentist.
This of course is not great for you because again typically all constructive communication tends to stop. Now I don’t know what stage you are at, but again typically when one partner pulls away, instead of it having the desired effect and making the other person pull away it can make them want to cling even tighter- and that sounds like you’ve taken on this role.
As harsh as this sounds, if your boyfriend is doing these things and you’ve asked him outright if he wants to end things, and despite what he may say you believe it’s over, then it’s time for you to prepare yourself emotionally for the end of that relationship.
I would normally advise to sit down and talk to your boyfriend and ask him to clarify what he means by boring etc because then you would know what the problem is and where it is to fix it, however if your boyfriend is intent on finishing the relationship then this could lead him to saying things to you to hurt you even more because he wants to make it easier for him and in some cases have someone to blame for the break up of that relationship.
I know that sounds cruel thing to do but sometimes the guilt can make others deliberately sabotage the relationship so that they can ‘blame’ the other person.
Okay this is what I suggest.
1. Ask him directly what is going on. You have nothing to lose here and potentially if the problem can be fixed at least you will know from asking.
2. Depending on his answer and how he answers decide for yourself whether or not the relationship is over
3. Prepare yourself emotionally for the end by acknowledging that it is over
4. Get the support of your girlfriends and decide on the practical things such as moving out or him moving out etc
5. Stop all intimate contact. This will make things harder if the relationship is at an end.
Disclaimer
Please note that as I do not have both of you hear to talk to, my advice may not be appropriate for your relationship and it is your responsibility therefore if you take my advice.
In saying that I wish you the best.